Oliver's denial
by bremen100
Summary: "There is one person in particular that I am grateful for. Someone that had stood beside me when times were darkest. She is the one who lights my way. Felicity Smoak, will you make me the happiest man, on the face of the earth.". Set after the 4th season 9th episode. Kind of a alternate ending that I was trying to concoct. That is it. Enjoy. Hope you like it.


Author's note – Hi everyone. I just had a need to write up an alternate ending for the S04 E09. before the idea left me. This idea had been bugging me. So that is it, guys, I can't reveal anything more as it would simply spoil the entire story. This is a one timer and this the first time I am trying my hands on an Arrow fanfiction.

Enjoy…

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The darkness had consumed him. Oliver was tripping. He had grown numb. He could not feel his fingers as they tangled around Felicity's blonde hair, caressing her still body hoping that she would show a tiny fleck of life.

Oliver put his finger on her abdominal region where the bullet hit her. There was a lot of black blood coming out of it, the bullet must have punctured her kidney, hence the black blood.

Blood spurted from the side of her lips rolled through the contours of her smooth pale skin onto the sleeves of his Armani.

He had to call for help.

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The doctors were busy with her in the Intensive Care Unit.

And after that Oliver zoned out. He could not think of anything else. The last time, he had been so dreadfully happy like she was all he needed, the look at her was enough to comfort him. It was like he could simply throw away his dark self and embrace the happiness that she was so overfilled with.

The positiveness in her was so sweet that it almost pained him to come back to reality.

The reality was too harsh or maybe it was because he wasn't harsh enough the first time he met Darhk.

Felicity on death bed.

It was like his brain had short circuited.

The turmoil was enough to screw with his brain. He needed to get out of there.

He had to focus the rage on something. He had to get Darhk or it would give him nightmares, like a knife that was slowly pushing its way through his already damaged heat, his soul, tarnished once again.

It was something more than fear since the last time he had experienced. It was something like a part of him was taken away from him, once again.

Darhk.

Damien Darhk. It was all his doing. It had to be him. The typical black trademarked outfit that they had, all of them were Ghosts, working for HIVE.

Nothing could get more crapped up than this. Everything had been moving beautifully, smoothly, he had proposed Felicity, finally, and nothing could ever begin to get good enough. Everything was perfect. He could have finally started a life with Felicity.

All of these now seemed to be a memory so distant that could never ever satiate him, not anymore.

She was critical and he didn't know if she would even get better.

Like he was cursed, again and again.

Just when he had saved the people he loved and cared about the most right from the clutches of death.

Oliver always pondered where he had actually gone wrong. Ever since he had started to date Felicity.

He gave up the dark madness that was eating him up, and every time he was weak he could feel it taking over him. Or was the darkness, the part of him that locked was locked away was the true Oliver that emerged out of the island. Maybe he had embraced his wrong aspect, the aspect which only made him weaker.

People like Darhk had to be dealt with his older former vicious self.

The Arrow was needed, not the Green Arrow.

Was he really purged out of his humanity, pain and suffering in the small island of Lian Yu to turn him into a weapon that he was?

The feelings inside had to go off. He had to turn it off like a switch.

Darhk was gonna pay for what was done to him again and again.

His mind seethed with rage, cursing Damien Darhk for all he had done.

Stripping away his life right before his eyes.

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He headed back to his lair. He pulled his costume on him, his quiver strapped behind to his back, the customised Oneida Eagle Kestrel, on his left palm.

The weapon itself felt heavy on his palms. The weapon that Felicity gave him, the weapon reminded him of Felicity, resounding, vibrating and shaking his very core.

How could he do it?

Without Felicity?

He had no idea.

He looked at the vacant revolving seat in front of the computers, wanting to be played with, the way Felicity does. It almost looked like the computers missed her.

He could see a faint silhouette of her in revolving carelessly, freely a sweet smile that she always had on face no matter what.

Tears hung from the corner of his eyes, stinging his eyes, threatening to fall any moment now.

Oliver gripped his bow tighter than ever. He closed his eyes.

He wanted all of it to end.

Oliver looked inside himself, searched within himself, the steel hearted, stone cold killer that he once was. He needed strength to bury the son of a bitch Damien Darhk for good.

The tears finally fell from his eyes.

And this finally helped him bury the love and hatred that he felt for her deep inside because he knew that unchecked emotions could be used by his opponent. The cold killer was almost beckoning him, wanting to come out of him, almost mocking him for holding his other self, trapped within himself for so long, because deep within himself Oliver knew that he was weak. He had to become the ruthless killer that he once was.

Cause Oliver knew that he needed power above all else.

Damien Darhk's powers were a complete mystery. And for yet another time, he did not care what might happen to him.

His hard green eyes set, almost lifeless, tightened the grip on his bow once again, lifting it up with practised ease.

He was about to leave when he saw Laurel walk in on him.

"Ollie, I ….." Laurel's voice quivered with sadness. Her eyes, they were red, the blueness of her eyes were so deep, filled with emotions but for some reason she was holding back.

But somehow they were strong, her resolve not lost at all, every bit of fire surging through her, only now it had been intensified for having lost a dear and a caring friend Felicity always was.

Oliver looked at her, her eyes were sad, she walked quickly and hugged him. Hugged him hard.

Laurel was now hysteric. She could hardly hold back. Oliver could feel her shaky jaws against his collar bone, reverberating through his neck muscles.

"Ollie, I am so so sorry. Its Felicity, they couldn't save her …"

Oliver heart almost stopped.

Felicity, dead?

He wanted to rewind.

No. He did not want to hear this.

No. He did not want any of this.

Oliver could not hold any longer.

He could not breathe.

The resolve that he had built to save himself was could not help him from this disaster could only take so much. This was too much for him.

Now with nothing to hold him, the tears fell down unhindered.

Oliver was crying his hearts out. He did not hold back. Not since his father and his best friend Tommy Merlyn.

He dropped his bow. It clanked down to the floor.

Nothing else mattered right now. His hands grew limp.

He needed someone to help him through this giant massacre in his head and heart.

He needed a human support, a human touch was all he craved then.

Laurel knew Oliver maybe even better than himself.

He hugged her back. No restraints. He buried his face in her shoulders.

It was like the two of them held on to each other for support.

Oliver for having lost his fiancé and Laurel for losing a dear friend and a comrade.

The positivity that she had on all of them.

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That is it guys.

I hope you have liked it. The plot had to be this way because I always imagined what the world would be like if Oliver ever lost Felicity and the episode gave me the jolt I needed.

Comments and reviews are appreciated and any areas upon which I could have improved, you could mention them, positive and negative alike.

Even PMs are appreciated likewise.

And please do tell me if I should write more one timers like this.


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